A couple of years ago I was told I’ve done this before, we all have, in prior lifetimes. Perhaps playing a different part but we have been here before, chose to forget and now it’s time to remember the truth. This time, we are making different choices. Choices that are promoting and inviting change. Transforming both Individually and Collectively. As Carolyn Myss states “what is in the one is in the whole”. So when I heal and transform so do you and vice versa. And on some level, what one does affects the whole because we are all connected.
The past couple of weeks have been challenging. I can feel the pain of the planet. I can feel it moving through me, a weight and heaviness. As my body is processing and releasing, which has not felt good at times, even with all my practices I’m feeling it all. The difference now is I’m aware of what is happening on the micro and macro level and the necessity of it all. Self care has to be ramped up. For me this includes a list of go to practices, deep breaths throughout the day, meditation, Reiki, Tapping/EFT, Kundalini Yoga, walks outside, journaling, rest, even just pausing for a moment to notice what I’m feeling, and more. I do these practices to feel more balanced and to embody more of a state of well-being. Being gentle with myself and understanding this is a part of ascension.
As the great awakening continues we become more aware and more sensitive to embody the 5th dimensional Unity Conciousness (Christ Consciousness). If you look at your pets that you love so much, they have heightened sensitivity as a survival mechanism (an acute sense of smell, hearing, they can feel the vibration of thunder, of a storm coming way before we do). As do we, but as humans this is not just for survival but will allow us to connect and create in ways we may never have thought possible. And although this sensitivity can feel like a burden at times it is also one of our greatest super powers.
You will be able to use the subtle senses to tap into others in a way that unites us. We already feel each others pain, happiness, joy, sadness, fear, etc which allows us to have more compassion for each other. But without having an understanding of this we easily become overwhelmed by all that we feel.
I do my practices to be able to bring balance to my nervous system to be able to handle the heightened sensitivity that I experience and understand the volume will be turning up over the next couple of years. So I want to continue to raise my vibration to be in alignment with the energy of abundance, gratitude, joy, love. Being sensitive allows me to read people’s energy (with permission of course), be able to travel through time, travel to other planes of consciousness, connect with others on a soul level and connect with souls that have left the physical plane as well. I gain clarity and the ability to discern, what is truth and what is false. To be able to know my energy versus anothers that has entered into my field. These are tools we will all need to remember (or learn) for our survival. This will no longer be optional.
If you need help to gain clarity, to heal your mind, body and spirit, to bring balance to the whole self, then please reach out. Book a Reiki session or card reading. Find support, healthy ways to navigate and adapt during these times of ascension. It may feel brutal at times but there are ways to give yourself the much needed self care and balance that your soul is guiding you to.
The Spirit Messages Daily Guidance Oracle Deck by John Holland.
Find your Center– When life feels chaotic it times to come back to your center. Slow down, stop as often as you can, pause and breathe into your heart. Check in with yourself, with your Soul. When you are centered, you can make grounded decisions from a place of clarity.
Stand your Ground– Stand up for what you believe in and to do what you know is best for you because only your Soul knows the plan that has been Divinely laid out for you. Remember only you know what is best for you. Remember there were certain lessons you came here to learn. If you find yourself in the same place, repeating the same patterns, feeling unfulfilled and an emptiness, this could be a test to make a different choice, one in which may make others uncomfortable but if it comes from a centered place, from your inner guidance system, your heart…you can’t go wrong. And even if it doesn’t make sense to others in the moment, it will when they see the bigger picture. It’s time to trust your True Self.
The Spirit Messages Daily Guidance Oracle Deck by John Holland
Support- This card is brought to you because we understand how much support you’re in need of at this precise time.
As many are feeling the challenges of the energy on the planet, make sure you are not only supporting yourself by ramping up self care but reevaluate the relationships in your life, in all areas. To include romantic relationships, friendships, your relationship with your children, family members, relationship to your job, to food, your relationship to your addictions, etc. Relationships are how we learn and grow but if there is a relationship that is no longer serving or depleting and zapping your energy then ask why are you holding on? This week with the energy of the Full Moon, it’s a perfect time to release all that does not serve. And look to those that support, uplift, and ignite your energy. And if you don’t have anyone in your life that does this then now is the time to find your group, your support team, your soul group. We all need extra support during these times. It’s okay to be vulnerable and ask for help when you need it.
9 of Water– The number 9 is the energy of global awareness, co-creativity in action, and the relationship between your power and that of Spirit and of others who share in the co-creation of the outer world. Water is the Element of the Heart and is associated with our emotions and relationships.
It is right to say no to what isn’t right for you, and now is the time to experience wishes fulfilled. The sweet harvest that came about from seeds you planted. You drink in the aroma of successful endeavor, take pride in your hard work and achievement, and savor the satisfaction of a job well done. You deserve to pause and acknowledge all you have co-created, and you do it joyfully.
This pairs perfectly with the podcast message I posted today that includes not only a message but an excercise or daily practice to incorporate. With all that is going on the world around us, find ways in which you can celebrate yourself and how far you’ve come. Can you look at even the unpleasant moments and see how they contributed something greater and have shifted you in a way that perhaps was difficult to see at the time. You can check out my podcast at https://anchor.fm/vivian-hawker/episodes/Celebrate-You-ejtj98.
Can turning off our capacity to feel shut down our capacity to heal? Our nervous system is working on over drive, at some point can shut down due to overload?
For the many years that I spent numbing out and chemically functioning through life, either on anti-depressants, sleeping pills, over the counter meds, drugs, alcohol, yet I hid it so well. I was still “functioning” and “responsible”, still doing my job as a mother, wife, an employee, taking care of our home but inside felt lost. As I’ve mentioned before, in 2017 I finally gave in to meditation, (specifically a Kundalini Yoga meditation called Kirtan Kriya; a simple mantra repeating Sa Ta Na Ma while touching my thumb with each sound to each finger tip). I was so desperate to feel change, to feel better, was wanting to move away from substances and also needed to try something different it in hopes that my daughter would try it as well because at a young age she was experiencing anxiety (which really was my undealt emotions). I had no expectations, honestly I was almost wanting to say “ha, see it doesn’t work for everyone”. But out of the blue I began to feel different, calmer, focused, clear for the first time.
The part that comes next not sure everyone will experience but rather quickly my senses began to sharpen, heighten, unexpectedly one night I heard guitar strings strumming out of no where, I would hear my name being called, even heard a choir of angels after a silent 45 minute meditation, flooded with different smells, strange at first but then I began to feel a rush of love, elation, bliss, ecstasy. I had hit that sweet spot where I was in a elevated state of awareness. I felt so connected to God, to the Universe that I couldn’t wait to meditate again. Experience after experience of a mystical loving nature. I began to connect with Angelic energy, my highest self, just an all loving presence and felt so present in presence. It was a feeling that surpassed any drug, as if we know it is possible to reach that point of absolute and we chase it our whole lives through our addictions. And not just chemical/substance abuse but chasing the high that shopping gives us, that gambling, that eating, that relationships, that even stress gives us, to fill the emotional void. Except for a whole year I was able to maintain this feeling even outside of meditation. Not the elation part but a steady feeling of joy, nothing bothered me, I had reached a level of clarity. It was like my Divine mind, heart and soul were all in alignment with God, the all that is almost all the time.
And just like everything else in my life, when I thought I mastered that I moved away from Kundalini Yoga and honestly never tried the array of breath work it provides along with the science to back up why the sound current of the mantras, the hand movements, the breathing techniques help to reprogram our subconscious mind and nervous system to bring us to whole balance.
Prior to the Dark Night of the Soul experience in May 2018, I would say around February, March 2018 I began to have a lot of self doubt, fear began to creep back in, after I became attuned to Reiki and began self healing which in turn made me take a deeper look at what I could no longer run from, the lies I had been telling myself. See although I was doing everything “right” on the outside, I really had not done the inner work (a complete spiritual bypass) and on my soul’s path it required that I have a deeper understanding of my blocks. Kundalini Yoga, is the yoga of awareness combined with Reiki Energy healing there was no more pretending, no more tolerance for the false self anymore. Although I try to stay away from labels now, I didn’t know I was an empath, I didn’t know we are all psychically gifted, I thought only those that were worthy not me were so inclined. As the planet continues to shift we are waking up more and more every day. Our level of awareness will continue to feel uncomfortable unless we do something to truly bring balance to our whole system.
I’ve been told we have the technology to keep up with this technological time we live in, but this technology is within all. Through practices that use the breath, sound, mantra, stillness, movement, ways of working with the body, we can reach a level of awareness of Conciousness that surpasses any computer program because we our Conciousness which is the cloud of wisdom, our heart is the mother board, and our Soul and Spirit are the directors that orchestrate it all alongside God, the light.
Subconscious Reprogramming, Release, Relief and why it is beneficial: The subconscious can only hold so much before it over flows. Due to the rise of technology and the massive amounts of input at our finger tips we need to rework our systems to handle this as we were not designed for this obsessive, compulsive, look up everything kind of access. People will begin to feel insane and sometimes this can happen in a moment. This has been a part of my experience so I can have a deeper understanding of how to help others that are experiencing symptoms due to this. As Collectively we are going through a subconscious release to shift the patriarchy, the Egoic, conditioned programming that will no longer work on the New Earth (the children of now don’t understand it and will not tolerate it, they came in with different programming, different light codes to help us shift out of this outdated way of being and living).
When we are conscious, we become self-aware. Aware of our thoughts and the programming which is our deep ingrained taught way of being, our beliefs that we soaked up like a sponge until we were 7 years old. These beliefs have been playing out in our world for so long. As we pay attention to the constant chatter that flows in our minds which is an outcome, based on our inner belief system, as well as the outer input that we allow in and soak up due to the fact that we can all feel on a much deeper level (energy transference). We can become the witness to the judgments we make about others and ourselves. Begin to ask where did this originate? Why do I think this way? Why do I believe this? Does it serve me? Does it feel good? Does it bring me joy or do I feel horrible, guilt and shame filled for having these thoughts? If so know it is quite normal. We are human, the human conditioning we have been born into is shifting and changing, which is a good thing. The outdated conditioning is breaking down over the next couple of years within each of us and we are literally receiving a DNA upgrade within our cellular memory (similar to a computer or an app that every now and again needs the updated version applied to it in order for it to run at it’s optimized strength and speed).
But change is usually not easy, if it was then everyone would do it. Many may say they want change but what I have seen (even in myself until I was forced to create change) they rather go through years of feeling horrible than do the inner work to create the change we want to see in our lives. We look back at let’s say 20, 30, 40 years of the same unserving behavioral patterns, as well as unwanted, uncomfortable physical ailments that can turn into chronic pain, that we keep complaining about but when approached with “you can finally heal this”, you can change that old lie and given the tools to do so, many run for the hills.
We are taught we don’t talk about certain things, families have secrets, skeletons in the closet and they need to stay in the closet. People die and we are told you get one week of bereavement pay because you should be over it in a week, there are so many rules that no longer work and will no longer apply in our evolving culture. Not in our evolving society, anymore. Look at what we have built a tolerance to. If you watch the news for 5 minutes, how many shootings, violence against another, bullying, robberies, how much hatred and anger erupts in our face in those 5 minutes? But yet we are conditioned that if we are not glued to this programming than we will miss out on something. This is our fear based world, that we have become numb to, why do we continue to accept so much fear? It has been our “norm”but it is no longer.
We have been brought to our knees and what I was asked during my Dark Night of the Soul experience is who is my biggest trigger?, If the darkness were to attack my children would I change? Of course. Well guess what your children feel, hear and see the parents shadows, they know your families secrets, they came here to be the light and to shine their light on our shadows. If we see them in pain will that finally make this madness stop? We will have no choice but to do the work, when we see our children fall to their knees at 7, 8, 9 years old watching your child have panic attacks, visions of being beaten, attacked verbally and physically but not their own trauma and hurt, to be the witness so that they can transmute our pain into light. To do what many volunteered to do which is turn your fear into love. To teach you how to love yourself. Because if we are not going to witness it someone has to, for it to be healed (this is science, not woo, woo stuff, it’s Quantum physics/ Quantum healing….the act of observing makes it so and heals).
I have held back for way too long about what I know, what I’ve been told, and how our children are the most brilliant beautiful innocent beings of pure love. They literally can walk into a store and everyone in the store shifts. I’ve seen it happen, unfortunately the child will begin to feel panicked, like they can’t breathe, sick to their stomach and practically drop whatever they have in their hands and run out to get away from all our garbage, from our energy. Or they drop down and have a tantrum out of no where. And Autism, these are the biggest light workers and you think they can’t communicate, they are telepathically speaking to us, you just have to much clutter in your brain to hear them. Or you just can’t believe that, telepathy is a thing but you’ll believe a prognoses and scary diagnoses.
Wake up people because if you do not take the steps to take care of yourself, your home, your side of the street, the garbage can only be piled so high before it implodes or explodes. This may seem harsh and I usually am not this brash but I experienced it. It was not easy and was not fun but there are ways to bring yourself to balance, to heal. I’ve spent the past couple of years testing so many different tools to be brought back to where I began and that was Kundalini Yoga Breath work/Meditation. I will be honest my nervous system was shot after my Dark Night of the Soul Experience in May 2018 but by making a commitment to self care to include practices that are consistent and combining Self Reiki healing (among other tools, such as, Mirror work, journaling, nature walks, prayer, so many self care tools to choose from. And perhaps it’s not a one size fits all and I hope you find what works for you). But this is the strongest I have felt ever. Perhaps I can be a mentor and a guide to assist you to find what works for you, as we all are transitioning and transforming.
And this strength not only helps me but ripples out and now my energy stays within my energy field and my aura acts like a lighted shield from negativity. I still feel and can connect but in a way that now my empathic nature has become a super power (I can feel the lies, I can feel the in-authenticity, I can feel the power of another, someone that is centered and full of love and some that could use a bit of strengthening in their own system. I can see through the perfect social media family portrait and feel the stress on those smiling faces. And I can have deep compassion because I know what it feels like, when we have to juggle so much and don’t feel we have time to give to the most important person in your life….You, the person you have look in the mirror).
This is aSuggestedTool and I suggest begin this practice today: So Darshan Chakra Kriya (a Kundalini breathwork meditation to get rid your subconscious garbage, de-clutter the mind and bring balance to the left and right side of the brain and our nervous system). This has saved my life along with other tools that I will share. Look it up on YouTube, super easy begin with 5 minutes and then increase to 11 minutes and so on. More tools to come, you may also contact me for a Reiki Session and I have no problem doing Reiki on children but parents need to do a session first and may need more than one session (I have witnessed after the parent heals, the child/children no longer have the issues the parents were seeing because it’s not the child’s issue it’s the parents that the child has taken on in some way).
We have many chakras within our body and in our subtle energy bodies as well. The seven main chakras, when balanced will have us feeling great joy, empowerment, love for self and others, feel connected to each other, feel in flow, life can feel easier, synchronicities are easily spotted like the Universe is constantly connecting the dots for us and bringing forth what we need next at any given moment. Abundance in all areas of life is felt, our awareness is broadened, we can take moments to pause and not be so reactive, feel a sense of total wellbeing, whole and complete. We can breathe long deep breaths, feel relaxed, grounded, energized and just have the total mind, body, soul connection in perfect coherence.
Think of our seven main chakras like spinning wheels within the body and the spine is what connects them all (the central location/ central nervous system). Imagine a tube of water of light that encases the spine that is in the center of our being it drops into the earth and connects to the light at the core of the earth and goes through the body out through the crown of our heads up above and connects to the light of the heavens to the source of all creation. This tube of light and the water that flows wants to be free flowing a constant, peaceful movement like a river. If we are out of balance it means the water is either stagnant, moving like a tidal wave, has a rock or boulder stuck blocking the water as if now a dam has been created that is about to blow because the pressure of the water has built up. The water needs to be constantly changing, moving because energy is constantly changing.
I never truly thought about how energy worked until the Universe began to show me how we are all energy, energetic beings. To many that have a difficult time understanding how can energy healing works? This is my attempt to try to explain it and our emotional centers, our chakra system in the simplest terms possible. We are made of mainly water, water being one of the greatest conduits for energy to flow. So I use a water analogy quite a bit. And if you compare our emotions to the storms, the stillness, the peace, the beauty of different bodies of water such as the ocean, lakes and rivers you can see how we are not different from nature but intertwined and very much part of what we see in nature and the cosmos every day. When a storm is brewing inside of us, we can also see how that is being played out in weather and what is taking place on a broader scale and going on collectively. There is so much that we know instinctively without having to go outside for our information because all our wisdom and greatest knowledge is within us.
Much of what I write is from experience, is my inner wisdom just working through me to get the messages out. To help others understand that there is not just a select few that can tap into this, we all can. Just sometimes we need to weed out the garbage first and allow our life force energy the chance to work through us to create the lives we always wanted, to feel free from fear and not let it get the best of us. We all have the capability to self heal and I have experienced this and witnessed it first hand. As an energy healer, I am not healing anyone I am just holding space as I witness God/Source heal and awaken your inner healer.
The Root Chakra is our first chakra (it’s our home base) at the base of our spine, the legs and feet. Our root chakra helps us to stay grounded, think of your self standing like a tree. If the trunk of the tree is rotting, weak and the roots are not well nourished the rest will not grow, it is not stable. The root is what gives us our stability, helps us feel safe, secure, a feeling of walking on stable ground. If we do not have a solid foundation than things can crumble literally and metaphorically in our being and in our life. Our root and lower chakras are where our family stuff resides. So if there are undealt with emotions, fears, insecurities, than unfortunately we can feel like the world is against us, have lack of trust in the outside world which really is lack of trust in ourselves. Fear and old negative family beliefs are running our lives. When you begin to strengthen your root chakra, the base and foundation of your being and your life with flourish like a well rooted and grounded tree.
When activated we can walk our talk, get on our life’s true purpose and path, create our own unique life experiences from a grounded place. So stay grounded, go outside walk barefoot in the grass, sit at the base of a tree, go into the ocean, play in the sand, take deep breaths and most importantly begin to take notice of the unwanted patterns that may stem from your families beliefs that perhaps they taught without knowing why (inherited unwanted family patterns) and if it doesn’t hold true to you then begin to create your own belief system, one that feels authentic to you. Write and journal your fears, insecurities, where your lack of self worth may stem from, old childhood wounds that you shoved deep, get rid of them.
Acknowledge they are there because most likely they are showing up in difficult ways whether you like it or not. Take time to meditate on them, use quiet time to breathe through these painful moments and memories. It can feel scary to face them but I have learned that if we don’t they will continue to show up in uncomfortable ways. When we make space for the pain, we can then release it so we are not constantly living in panic, fear and chaos (not knowing when it will show up). I meditate but realized recently that with intention during meditation I asked for my pain and sadness to show up in those moments during meditation so I could acknowledge them, allow them to surface at that time with the intention to let it go. This way I created the space for the pain so it wasn’t showing up during inconvenient times, like spending time with friends, at work in the middle of a meeting. Or out of the blue having panic attacks because again this part of us just wants acknowledgement and our bodies want us to be healthy, it wants us to heal and is trying to let us know now is the time. Isn’t it nice that you can actually make that time rather than it taking over you.
I love Reiki energy healing because it works to rid the body on many different levels of old stagnant, stuck energy and allows our life force energy to free flow the way it is meant to. If you are feeling stuck, contact me to schedule a session.
When we feel self-love & have a healthy self esteem, it becomes easier to make decisions from an authentic place. Many of us have a difficult time making decisions, even simple decisions can have some of us spiralling out of control. I’ve been in those indecisive shoes many of times, when even the simple things in life begin to feel chaotic. That’s when it’s time to go into my tool box, grab a self care practice or two. It’s time to do some self healing, take the time to be still, run Reiki through me to bring me back to balance and clarity. This week I experienced the tail end of Mercury Retrograde (although I don’t know the specifics of what Mercury Retrograde is I definitely felt and experienced the energy of it). It felt as though I was going backwards, very sensitive, couldn’t think clearly, felt defensive, just off. Luckily after a Reiki session I was brought back to my center, felt energized yet calm and very clear again.
During these times of high vibration and light streaming in, it is natural that old stuff is going to come up to be healed. In the process though it can at times feel painful and uncomfortable. Luckily there are many self care practices that you can implement to bring you back to balance with a quickness (this is why I have daily self care practices that are non negotiable).
When you are unsure of what decision to make, here is a simple decision making question, ask “Does this lift me up without putting someone else down?” Ask yourself this question as you make choices throughout your day! And if you do not have a daily self care practice begin to look into ways that you can give to yourself. This will boost your self esteem and your self worth!
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